queeranarchism:

I can’t believe this needs saying again but…

Great: analyzing how sexism spreads the systematic idea that pussies are dirty and how, among other consequences, that results in a large number of cisgender men being uncomfortable eating pussy while being perfectly comfortable receiving a blowjob. 

Not great: demanding that those men immediately unlearn all of that, pressuring those men into a sex act they are not comfortable with in that moment, claiming that refusing that sex act would make them sexist.

Like, that’s rape.

I could write a whole broader post about how unlearning systematic ingrained things always has a learning process and if you’re not willing to support people through that imperfect progress because they’re not woke enough for you yet, you shouldn’t be hanging out with them at all. Just leave if you can‘t summon the empathy to let real change take place.

But let’s start with don’t rape people, okay?

  theinkstainsblog: Fully agreed. My only addendum would be if you choose not to give them blowjobs until they’re comfortable eating out (your choice) and they then get mad about it… ditch them. Still don’t rape them. Just ditch them, if you’re respecting their right to choose, they can respect yours.

Yup. Don’t say shit like ‘If you don’t eat pussy I’m gonna ditch you”, that’s just emotionally coercing someone into a sex act and as such it is, yep, still rape. I repeat: threatening to leave someone unless they do a sex act for you is rape.

Accept the flawed place they’re at or leave. It’s that simple. If you don’t wanna deal in an empathic consent-aware way with where they’re at, accept that they’re not a person you should be having sex with and Just Leave.